I feel like a fool. Of course I’m burnt out. I have a newborn baby now. Can I go back to the swollen feet from July 1st and the belly so big and stretched and awkward? No? Ok then.
Here is a picture of how I feel right now:
I think all new moms/dads feel like this. Mostly moms because of the hormones on top of everything we go through.
Here’s the deal
I woke up on July 7th around 4am with a hip cramp. I fell asleep a few times but it kept coming back. Around 4:30, I remember thinking ‘this pain keeps coming and going and it’s not a normal hip pain’. I used my app to Tim contractions and they were around a minute and a half long with a break of 7-9 minutes… If I was up and about, they got worse and closer together and when I would lay down, got better. I gave Mr A a heads up that I thought it was weird hip contractions and it could be the day. I told him to go to work and I would keep him posted.
I called my mom and at 7:30am, she and my aunt came to get me. We made our way to the hospital and when they checked, I was at a 1.5cm. Da Bum Tsss. So a shot of morphine/gravol and I was home again. I slept most of the day. If you ever had that shot, you feel me. I remember walking my living room and leaning against the wall during contractions to make something happen. Mr A came home, ate and had a shower. We were on our way to the hospital. It was around 6pm.
I got the the hospital and they checked me again. I was at 2-3cm (yeah, I know. All day and barely a change). They gave me a non stress test to check baby and after 40 minutes, I was at 4cm so they kept me. They said I would only be able to get an epidural around 2am because the anesthesiologist was crazy busy. I got scared because I was already in pain. The nurse said she wanted to switch me to another room because she didn’t like that room and from walking 3 doors down, they started an IV, got a blood test and halfway through everything, they said the lady was coming up to get me the epidural. Someone was running behind and she had the time for me. It was magical.
I was so scared of getting one and the bla bla about having problems or being paralyzed and crap. This epidural saved my birth. I was pretty medicated the rest of my labor and I’m grateful for it.
I barely remember a thing other then sleeping and being told to save my strength for pushing. I remember every time i opened my eyes, it was different family members looking at me. Mr A, my mom, my aunt and my grandparents all took turns because it was a long night. I remember everyone asking at least once if I was cold because I was shaking so much. The nurse said the epidural could do that and my body was still in pain and having contractions even if I couldn’t feel them so it could have been that as well. I remember vaguely being told baby flipped sideways and she was going to try and flip her back manually. I remember feeling a weird pressure and a pop and warm. I thought I had peed but my water broke just before they got ready to break it because I stalled.
Then it was time to push. I didn’t feel anything because I was mostly frozen. One hour and 19 minutes later, baby girl was born with the help of the vacuum. I remember mumbling about how I couldn’t hear her crying and after what felt like an eternity, she started crying. Then I started crying. They had her up on my chest for a bit.
With all the jokes about how he wouldn’t make it in the room because of the goo that comes with birth, Mr A did great. Sat at my side, facing my face and was wonderful.
So welcome Victoria to the world, 8 lbs 7 oz.
Holding Daddy’s finger
9 hours old, crusty mouth and all.
I’m too cute for you
36 hours old
Me, Mr A and LilV
I can’t help tooting my own horn. She came out beautiful and we are both over the moon for her.
Scared New Mom 